Lesson #17: Life Isn't Always About Competition

Don't get me wrong, I don't think that there's anything wrong with a little healthy competition. Actually, I think that a little competition can really motivate a person to do their best work or be the best that they can. However, there are times when being too competitive can be a bad thing. Winning shouldn't be the main focus in your life; sure, it's nice to win sometimes, but I think that being okay with losing every once in a while can help you grow as a person. It's important not to get too wrapped up in the competition but rather to just enjoy what you're doing.

Monica is by far the most competitive of the friends. In fact, she never misses the chance to turn something in to a competition or to show off her knowledge. She holds herself to a strict standard and does not settle for anything less.

For example, one Thanksgiving, the gang decides to play a friendly game of touch football during halftime. Ross and Monica initially decline the invitation due to the fact that their mother banned them from playing the sport. When questioned about it, Monica reveals that they used to play a game of football every Thanksgiving (which they named the Geller Bowl) and that "one year, Geller Bowl VI, [Monica] accidentally broke Ross's nose." Ross questions the accidental nature of the injury and accuses Monica of cheating to win the game. The two argue over this and eventually challenge each other to a rematch. 

As the game goes on, Monica and Ross continue to get more and more competitive until the rest of their friends go inside to enjoy their Thanksgiving dinner. Ross and Monica stay outside and fight over the football.

Another instance of Monica letting her competitive nature get the best of her is when she wagers her apartment in a bet with Chandler and Joey. The game starts out as a friendly bet when Chandler and Joey bet that they know Rachel and Monica better than the two women know them. They have Ross think up questions to ask them to determine who knows who best. 

When the game comes down to a tie, Ross announces that he's prepared for this and has come up with a lightning round. Monica decides to up the bet from the original $100 they were playing for to her apartment. When Rachel expresses her unwillingness to lose their apartment, Monica guarantees her that they won't. 

However, when it comes down to it, Monica and Rachel ultimately lose when they are unable to answer the question, "what is Chandler Bing's job?"

While Monica's competitive nature is a part of her personality and shapes the person that she is, it often gets her into trouble. I think that she would be better off if she stopped worrying so much about winning and took the time to just enjoy being with her friends. 

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Lesson #16: You Can't Choose Your Family

I remember when I was living at home there were days when I just couldn't stand to be around my family. Whether it was my sisters "borrowing" my clothes without permission or my parents giving me another lecture, there were definitely quite a few times when I wished that I could have had more of a say in who my family was and how they acted. Being at school, however, has really shown me that even though we might not get along one hundred percent of the time, I am really grateful for every single member of my family and I wouldn't trade them for the world. My family is my support system; they love me no matter what and while they can potentially get frustrating at times, I am so lucky to have them.

Monica and Ross are two siblings that I think perfectly embody this lesson. Both Monica and Ross clearly have their faults, but at the end of the day, the two of them truly do love and support each other. However, that's not to say that they don't get on each other's nerves.

For example, as Monica and Chandler are preparing for their upcoming wedding, Ross announces to everyone that he has a surprise for them during the ceremony. When they hear someone playing the bagpipes loudly (and extremely badly) from across the street, they realize that Ross is planning on playing them a song at their wedding.

The couple confronts Ross about his "gift" and Monica tells him that he can't play the bagpipes at their wedding because, according to Chandler, they hate them. Ross begs them to give him a chance to change their minds, promising that "when it's over . . . there will be a wee bit o' Celebration."

(This scene also lead to some of the funniest Friends bloopers of all time.)

Monica and Chandler still ultimately refuse to have Ross perform at the wedding with a resounding "NO!", but although they were annoyed at Ross's antics, he was really only tying to be a loving brother to both of them.

Another pair of siblings who were often at odds during the majority of the series is Phoebe and her twin sister, Ursula.

Phoebe and her sister have a slightly harder time getting along than Monica and Ross, mostly because of how hostile Ursula acts towards Phoebe and the fact that Phoebe is still upset about the things that Ursula did to her as a child, like throwing her Judy Jetson thermos under a bus, breaking her collar bone, and stealing her first boyfriend. They carry their resentments toward each other into adulthood and, as a result, the two hardly see each other. 

Ursula seems to be every bit as odd as Phoebe, but that's about where the resemblance ends. While Phoebe is kind and sweet, Ursula is cold and manipulative. The two are polar opposites, and the few times that Ursula appears on the show it's usually to antagonize Phoebe in some way (like starring in adult films using Phoebe's name).  

So I guess the moral here is that whether you get along with them or not, your family is your family. You can't choose them, but you can choose your friends.

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Lesson #15: Don't Let Your Anger Get the Best of You

Anger is a totally normal human emotion that everyone has experienced before. And as much as we don't like to admit it, we've all had moments in our lives where we have let our anger get the best of us. Much of the time, it seems that we let everything build up inside of us until we finally just blow up over something that really isn't worth getting so upset about. I have definitely been in situations like this where my anger has gotten the best of me, and I have always regretted it afterwards.

Out of all six of the friends, Ross definitely has the most difficult time managing his anger.

In his defense, he does have plenty to be angry about--his several divorces (including his impending one that is a result of him saying the wrong name at the altar), the fact that he just lost his apartment and had to move in with Chandler and Joey, and probably the most devastating of them all, that his boss ate his sandwich.

  

I know what you're thinking, it's just a sandwich. It can't have been that big of a deal, right? Wrong.

Because this sandwich wasn't just any regular sandwich. It was Monica's special Thanksgiving leftover sandwich. When Chandler tries to make light of the situation and point out that it was, after all, just a sandwich, Ross replies by telling everyone, "I am 30 years old, I'm about to be divorced twice and I just got evicted! That sandwich was the only good thing going on in my life! Someone ate the only good thing going on in my life!" Monica offers to make Ross another sandwich to take to work, and Phoebe writes a threatening note for him to put on his lunch so that nobody steals it again. However, this note is a little too threatening and causes people at work to become scared of him.

At work, Ross' boss Donald confronts him about his recent behavior, and Ross responds by telling him that he only had to get tough because someone ate his sandwich. As they talk, Donald reveals that he was the one who ate Ross' sandwich, and Ross doesn't exactly take it well. 

After yelling at his boss, they bring a psychiatrist into work to see Ross, who then tells him that he has to take a leave of absence from his job. Ross starts to get "worked up again" over this news, so the psychiatrist gives him a tranquilizer which calms Ross down substantially. 

Clearly, his sandwich isn't the only thing that Ross is upset about, but the way he chose to handle the situation ended up almost costing him his job completely. It's important not to hang on to anger because if you do, it can ultimately end up controlling you. 

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